Cheeky Chums have been looking at the sensitive area of pregnancy “baby bereavement” in this weeks daily blog posts.Today we shall be looking at Preparation of giving birth to your stillborn baby. To help prepare yourself mentally, and emotionally and help create the best memories possible.If this blog post is too painful please press your back button now.
You have loved, nurished,treasured, become excited all the way through your pregnancy and the doctors have just told you that unfortunately right at the last trimester your baby has died in the womb.
You are heavily pregnant now. You cannot take a pill and it will all go away you need to be strong and pluck up the courage to deliver your stillborn baby.
Here are some important facts and practical preparation tips that you can put into practise to make it as painless as possible and help you cope with your loss.
1.Tell your closest family and whoever you need to be there for you at the time of delivery.
2.Spend time with your baby after delivery if at all possible.
3. Take as many family pics together of you all as you can. or ask a family member to do it for you so you can all get to hold baby.
4. Even young children can deal with grief don’t ignore them because you may not know what to say its a part of growing up and if you are not scared your children won’t be. Create a loving atmosphere in memory of the last moments and it will be good ones later down the line. Some mums wished they had held baby even 30 years later and deeply regret it causing many hurts. Its because they can not turn the clock back “you don’t get another chance”.
5. If baby is small you can order tiny baby burial clothes and precious clothes to put on baby before the funeral at the bereavement section of Cheeky Chums sizes start from 5 inches.It gives you the opportunity to dress baby at least once or twice before a final sleep and burial/cremation.Baby is then dressed with dignity and respect instead of being wrapped in just a blanket for final goodbyes.
6.Create a memory box,add photos, teddy, baby outfit you would have brought baby home in to help you deal with grief. Write poems and your daily thoughts on a card and add these to the box over the next few months or so you will be creating valuable memories for baby keeping them treasured forever in baby’s own little box.
7. After the funeral you may want to not talk to any one for approx 2 weeks, it does help to talk about baby as much as possible instead of keeping hidden feelings building up.But You may need this short period where you and your partner can greeve privately. Share your thoughts and emotions with loved ones, family and friends closest to you so you don’t build barriers.If you say nothing to anyone It can leave to awkardness with freinds/neighbours as they may not know how to spark up a conversation under the tragic circumstances.
8. My last food for thought is join as many support groups as you can deal with and if help is offered take it.
A something Precious video on stillborn baby in womb